I've fallen into an endless pit of fury and despair,
I stumbled- I'm sorry, do you hear me- I stumbled and fell in,
Head first, arms tightly tied behind my back,
wrists held together by the ropes of confusion and burning hatred
of all that I wished never to have done.
I am mindless, a slave to you all,
nothing but a spirit restlessly lurking in a world, unloved and alone,
had wished for nothing but another to walk along my path, the both of us, hand-in-hand,
as we watch the sun take its cache behind the world.
The breath of life slowly flows through my arms, then seeps out of my fingertips as I struggle
to take another breath, just for another glimpse of your flawless face.
Wishing to never have been born, never to have lived to see another day,
because all is lost, my world has been drained of color,
and is slowly collapsing underneath the weight of my own agony.
This suffering- I deserve,
all the more as you deserve your peace and love,
and though I'd do anything to release myself of all the pain
that I've fallen victim to, I cannot abandon you.
I'm hidden in the shadows, stealthily watching, I am your guardian.
I forever will be, until my presence loses all value,
and I slip away in fulfillment of my dreams.
Is this the way it's gotta be?
Good intentions, all my care, all my heart,
yet the darkness returns, bites my flesh only to inject me with great anguish.
This is my coma.
Will I ever rise to live again,
rise to smile again,
rise to love again?
Rise to breathe again,
rise to sing again,
rise, healed of these wounds?
Here I am, gazing into the river that rushes by faster
than the beating of my own heart.
The face that stares back is afraid.
I await for the restoration of my shattered universe;
I await for his return.
But perhaps it's too selfish of a wish.